"For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do." Romans 7:19
Do you ever get frustrated at yourself? I know I sure do! This verse in Romans is the cry of my heart all too much! After salvation, there began a war in my heart. Oh how I long to please my Lord with my thoughts, actions and words! Yet, I still have my flesh present, fighting against the good I so long to do!
I have spent so many mornings, asking the Lord to make me a good testimony to the lost, to help me not get upset or frustrated when circumstances get stressful or uneasy, to help me not complain and gossip. I've prayed for God to help me with these things that I don't want to do so much, and yet, so often at the end of the day I feel I've failed.
Just recently, God spoke to my heart as I was thinking about areas in my character I long for the Lord to help me do better for Him in. And as I thought and prayed, God impressed upon me that it is not just that I need to "do better" in these areas, but ultimately, I need God to soften and change my heart in these areas!
I don't need to keep asking the Lord to help me to "do better", I need Him to purge me from unthankfulness, selfishness, impatience, a lack of love for others and so much more! If my heart is right, only then, will I truly be able to please my Lord!
And so, my prayers have changed! Instead of asking for help to do better, I ask Him to give me a heart to show mercy like He has shown me, to see the good in situations and people, to be thankful for all the blessings He has given me despite my unworthiness, to put others good before my own! When my heart is merciful, I am more patient. When I am more thankful, I complain less. When I see the best in others, it keeps me from gossip and a critical spirit.
It all starts in the heart!
